Tribute to a dear friend

His funeral is today. I just can't bring myself to go. I wanted to honor him today by sharing this with you. He was always so full of life and energy. We were such good friends all through junior high and high school. Sometimes best friends. Ah....such sweet school day memories! We sat together on the bus most of all those six years. We shared our hopes and dreams for the future. We shared joy and heartache. We laughed and joked and pulled pranks on the bus and no one ever found out it was us! We shared homeroom and some classes together. We shared our experiences and talked about our dates, our going steadies and the break ups.  He loved to tease me about that "long haired hippie freak" that I dated the last three years of high school - the man I married and have been married to for the last thirty plus years.

So many memories of our friendship came flooding in when I heard he had died. We lost touch after graduation. You know how that goes. He didn't show up at any of our class reunions and  more than twenty years went by before I saw him again.... We ran into each other one autumn day and spent the next two hours catching up. He confided in me that he now had chosen a gay lifestyle and the reasons why. He thought I may not want to remain his friend. Others had done that.  I assured him that our years of friendship were not damaged by his choice - he had been my dear friend since seventh grade.  I will never forget the tears in his eyes as he threw his arms around me and hugged me, thanking me for unconditional friendship. We saw each other every now and then after that through the years. He got cancer. It was bad. He got through it. A while back he told me it was back and it didn't look good. He seemed so sad and defeated. I promised him as before I  would be praying for him and not to give up. We hugged and held on a few moments longer, both teary eyed. It ended with "see you later"....that was the last time I saw him.

He has been in my thoughts all day long with tears and a million memories...his smile and laughter...so full of life...that's what I want to remember. His funeral is today. I just can't bring myself to go.